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Post by En on Sept 2, 2003 14:05:59 GMT -5
Sondra... look, I really want you to send me an IM, okay, and tell me what's up. Like, what's going on that makes this seem like the only thing to do. Please?
Meanwhile... you have never struck me as an attention-getter. Anyone who says you're just doing this to get attention needs to realise that it's damn selfish of them not to give people attention when they need it. You need it. You need to talk to somebody. There is nothing wrong or weak about that. It's possible that you have a chemical imbalance, and that's just like getting the flu or pneumonia -- you need to see a doctor. Or maybe there's something tough in your life right now, and you need to talk to someone about it, which happens to all of us at some point.
Either way, you need and deserve to talk to someone. I don't know how much I can do without being there, but if it helps to tell us or me what is happening, please go right ahead. We understand what it's like to feel like you're out of options, and we understand what it's like to go it alone. That's part of what brought TD together. Let us help you together.
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Post by Nie on Sept 3, 2003 3:22:33 GMT -5
Ok, this is a first for some time that i have been able to express to others what has happened but i'm hoping that someone can help. About two weeks ago i had cut my wrists again. not letting anyone know about it but i now its getting worse and it seems like the only solution with everything going on. and just the other day I re-opened my wounds. I can't see any other way out and i do know it is getting out of hand and i can't turn to my friends here cause they would think its some type of attension seeking. Please can anyone help me? Sondra, I second everything that En has said.
Also, have you asked yourself exactly why ou cut yourself? Is it to just get out? Or is it to create new physical pain in an attempt to drown out pain inside? I'm just asking because there are different ways of helpin you to get through this depending on what the reason is and we're all here to help you whenever you need us.
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Post by Sondra Roswin on Sept 3, 2003 6:00:25 GMT -5
Lirael Grey your right about one thing i am trying to drown the pain inside with physical pain, its just too much to handle at the moment. En I wish i could see a doctor or even a coulsier just the ones i know here you need parent permission or something like that. its been going on for about a year and the thing that i'm scared of is that no one has noticed not even my own family which makes my think i am nothing and i just start thinking like that and i can stop.
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Post by En on Sept 3, 2003 15:53:27 GMT -5
Families can be blind. It's not necessarily because they don't care -- it's just really easy for people to assume that you're okay, because that's the easy thing to do. Same goes for friends. If they knew, they'd be trying to help you, or at least stop you from hurting yourself.
It sounds like the pain is becoming a way for you to cry out, in which case the only way to stop will be for you to find another way to reach out. Who can you talk to? Do you have any teachers you trust, or a religious person, or an adult friend? Because any of them would also be able to help you find a counseling service. They might say they need parental consent, but someone is out there who will help you because you need help. You just have to find them, or talk to someone who can find them for you.
I know it's going to be hard -- once you get to where you can't feel any other way out, it's almost impossible to step back and tell yourself, Go talk to someone. But you have to do it. I think you know that.
We want you to take care of you. It sounds like what's happening is a medical problem, Sondra... you know how when you get really hurt, or really hungry, it's hard to make yourself get up the energy to go help yourself? That's where it sounds like your heart is now. We'll bring you what we can, but you're going to have to get your own feet under you and go for help.
Talk to us, Sondra.
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Post by Sondra Roswin on Sept 4, 2003 0:17:23 GMT -5
The only people i do have to talk to is everyone on TD. its just peoples additue here, and it makes you feel like shit. i know for a fact that some people have gone through the same thing i am going through now and thats why its easy to talk to you guys. I know i have to see someone soon...real soon and i'll have to make the time and i know i'm the only one who can really do it. but i really do feel alone out here.
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Post by En on Sept 4, 2003 11:09:43 GMT -5
I wish I could be there to give you a hug and sit with you a while. Dunno about you, but when I went through some tough times, I used to get this actual ache across my chest, thinking about how I had no one I could reach to. It is hard, not having someone who can talk to you and hear when there are tears in your voice and know when to put a hand on your shoulder.
It doesn't help much, I'm sure, but know that we would do that if we could.
Do you have stuff you can do to distract yourself? Running or swimming, or reading, or painting or playing music, or even chores or something? I'm weird like this but -- I find that if I have a pattern of stuff to do, even if it's not necessary stuff but just like reading for an hour every afternoon when I get home from work, it still helps me feel like I have something I have to be around for each day.
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Post by Leia Skye on Oct 4, 2003 13:31:26 GMT -5
Sondra, I was just discharged from the hospital for the same thing that you're going through. So if you want to talk I definitely understand and I've learned some things that might be helpful to you. Feel free to IM me anytime or send me an e-mail, anything. I know we've never really talked until now but I certainly know who you are and everything and it would make me (and probably everyone on this board) incredibly sad if you were to leave us.
I hope things get better for you soon.
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Post by En on Oct 4, 2003 16:24:35 GMT -5
Leia! You certainly are one for dropping shells... Are you okay? What's going on? At least send me an IM
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Post by Sondra Roswin on Oct 5, 2003 5:39:13 GMT -5
Thank you for your concern, but i'm working things out now it may be going slowly but its getting there. And i was able to actually tell someone but they didn't take me seriously which is a down side. So i'm trying to keep myself busy with my studies seeming i have trials in two weeks. I just hope that my studies will keep my mind off things.
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Post by Leia Skye on Oct 5, 2003 9:31:02 GMT -5
Good. I hope so too. It always helps me to keep busy too.
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S.S Tigress
Slytherin Alumni
Shots in the dark from empty guns, never heard by anyone
Posts: 1,345
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Post by S.S Tigress on Nov 1, 2003 16:48:35 GMT -5
I've been dating this guy at my school and before we dated we were good friends. We would always talk about everything and it was great. But I sort of, got upset about something and I ended up crying in front of him. I dont cry in front of guys cuz they're not good with that stuff. Sure enough, the next day we didn't really talk all too much to me. I asked him if it was about the other day, he said no. I believed him, but he was acting weird for almost a week. So I went to the School's councilor and she said she'd talk to him for me. She told me the next day that he seemed fine. He mentioned it to me, I asked "Are you pissed at me for going to her?" He said no. But since then (about 5 days now) he still won't talk to me. My friend talked to him and apperently he's really pissed that I went to go talk to the counsilor. He's sort of talking to me, but he doesn't give me hugs (I'm a huge hug person) and most of the time that he says something to me, it's usually about how he thinks other girls at our school are attractive. Example "Yea Nina is really hot, so is Tania..I guess I just like girls who are really pale and have really dark hair." (I'm not either of those.)
I know this probably sounds real dumb, it being a high school relationship and all but I'm kind of upset about it, and I have no one to talk to...I can only really talk to him cuz we were so close but it doesn't look like that can work.
Edit: just typing that out makes me feel a little bit better actually...
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Calantha
Gryffindor Alumni
My name is Luck, this is my song, I happened by when you were gone
Posts: 4,493
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Post by Calantha on Nov 1, 2003 19:29:54 GMT -5
Hey Tigress, I'm glad you feel better after typing it out. And don't think any problem is dumb, alright? Trust me, even the things which are really trivial you can learn from and I don't think any lesson you learn is dumb, right?
Not all guys handle crying poorly. The guy I have dated on an off for a while now is probably one of the only people I can go to when I'm upset enough to cry. I don't cry a lot, so when I do, it's easy for me to go to him because he's so comforting about it. Well, you've already gone and talked to your counselor and there isn't anything you can do to fix the past. Instead of going through the whole "he said she said" ordeal...why not just talk him the whole thing? And if he doesn't want to talk about it, then just give him some time...you might have caught him off guard. Or something else might be going on in his life that he isn't sure about and so it's easy for people to lash out with people they know because they know they'll still be there for them, even on a bad day. I know for me friends make up the most stable portion of my life, and it's really to nice to know that I can be having an awful day and lash out on them and still know they're still going to love me.
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S.S Tigress
Slytherin Alumni
Shots in the dark from empty guns, never heard by anyone
Posts: 1,345
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Post by S.S Tigress on Nov 2, 2003 10:13:59 GMT -5
I never thought about it that way. I think I'll just give him time. This weekend is Parent Weekend so he's spending it with his parents. Maybe he'll talk to me on Monday.
Thanks Calantha.
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Natz
Ravenclaw Alumni
Posts: 4,269
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Post by Natz on Nov 9, 2003 6:53:10 GMT -5
Help
I hope this doesn't seem too trivial but since my experience with History and finding out that i didn't like the course i came home from uni and my parents are now trying to get me back on track. The trouble is i don't know what course i want to do at the moment As a career i would like to help people and would much appreciate some advice on what courses i could take or would help me. I am feeling kind of lost at the moment.
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Post by hermoine on Nov 9, 2003 7:28:59 GMT -5
So Natz, I hope I can help you by saying this. It seems like you're into social working and stuff? 'Cause if that's what you wanna do, well there are specific ccourses for that kind of thing. My Social Studies teacher used to be a social worker, and she told us she used to teach the ones who were illeterate. Correct me if I'm wrong in having assumed this.
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