Traditions, ancestors.. A thread about family

[Will]

I hope I’m putting this in the right place…

So I had this idea of a thread ever since the week of Thanksgiving. My father had been talking a lot about family trees and such because he wants to create a web site for our family. The thing is, we don’t know much about our ancestors. My grandmother and grandfather, from my father’s side, fled from China to Taiwan during their early years. In doing so, they were separated from cousins and so on. What kind of tree can we make with this limited information? So I was wondering, how much do you know of your extended family?

Now all this talk of family led me to think of traditions. I remember, when I was little, all my aunts, uncles and cousins would drive up to Lake Tahoe for Christmas every year. Now, with my older cousins off to collage and busy aunts and uncles, some in different countries, we never get a chance to do this anymore. It’s rather disappointing, but I understand. At lest we still try to get everybody to attend Thanksgiving and Chinese New Year dinner.

Hmmm… I’m a first generation Asian American. My blood is pretty much pure Chinese/Taiwanese, as far was we know... How about you guys? Do you have a diverse family ((mixed blood))?

One more thing for now. I’ve been asking about my parents’ and grandparents’ childhood just because I’m interesting in the life they lived back then. Are you guys curious too? Do you know a lot about your parents’ background?

Wow… that was a lot…

[Ivy]

My grandma (on me mum's side) was a coal miner's daughter or so I've been told. Our family is rather diverse I'm a third generation mexican and we really don't know much about our past because I'm sort of having a hard time believing what my great aunt told me about our family history. According to her my great grandfather (or something like that) swam here from Mexico. I believe I read somewhere that people actually did that but I don't know... Um... other than that yeah... my grandmother is from the south and my father's family is all TexMex.

Traditions... um... we spend every Christmas with both of my grandmas. We have our little family thing here and then we go over to my mom's family's house where all of my aunts and uncles and cousins are. My aunt that lives in TN even comes up for the holidays. Then we go to my the other grandma's house and it's basically the same thing all my aunts uncles and cousins. We make cookies in my house and our grandma (dad's side) comes over and we make tamales. Hee hee that's basically it except my mum always has Thanksgiving over by us and it's hell cuz I have to help out a lot.

[Ceridwen]

Ummm... I'm really, really, really boring in that I'm just Irish, plain and simple. I know a little bit about my great-grandparents, but that's as far back as my knowledge goes. I actually don't even know what part of the country they were from, but I know my great-granny was a seamstress, and my great-grandad (on the other side) drove a milk carriage, with two horses, and he had a great singing voice. My grandparents - well, my maternal grandfather was a barber, who deserted his wife (my grandma, obviously), leaving her with three children to raise, and he'd already had a wife before her.. hence I have a lot of half-aunts and uncles in England, which is where he went. My grandma raised my mother and her sister and brother alone, and died when I was four. She was only 63. My paternal family - my grandfather was a labourer in a leather factory (horrible, stinky, smelly work) and my nana was a lady's maid until she got married, and then proceeded to bear 12 children, 4 of whom died in infancy. It's a sad story, but it was the same everywhere, at that time.

As for traditions... well, I think our Christmas is fairly standard, we don't really do anything that the rest of the world doesn't do, except maybe we have Midnight Mass, which is beautiful, but I haven't gone for years. Once a year, at harvest time, we go to the graveyard for the blessing of the graves, but again, I haven't been for years. It's called the 'Patron', and I think it's fairly unique. And that's really it. Hm... nothing too earth-shattering there! ;D But it's a lovely thread idea, Willow.

[Natz]

For christmas we have our family round to our house for christmas dinner then we go to our grandma and grandads for boxing day celebrations. On new year we maybe go to our cousins party or just have a meal.

Mixed blood. Well the part i do know about is that i am 1/16 welsh and 1/8 irish because a lot of my great uncles were from ireland dublin if you want to be specific and i'm not sure about the rest.

I would love to trace my family tree.

[S.S Tigress]

A while back my dad actually had a site that had my whole family tree on it. I don't remember what happened to it but it was pretty neat. All my ancestors lived in Poland, I'm the first generation to live in the US. Seeing as we're polish, there's not much good fun history...we're a peace-loving country. I mean there is the holucaust (sp?) but that didn't affect my family all too much because my grandparents are christian. The most that happened was that my grandfather became a slave on a farm for several months.

the only christmas tradition we got is a nice dinner on Christmas Eve where we have...oh wow I forgot what it's called but it's a polish dish, very yummy.

[En]

Ah. *rubs hands together*

Ceri, I'd never heard of Patron before... Do you know where/how that got started?

*grins at everyone's traditions* This is part of what I love about TD... we're so wonderfully diverse. I'd love to make this our theme for the winter holiday this year -- having everyone bring one different bit of tradition to our festivities. So let's compare notes and see where our unique bits are!

I could go on at length about my family, since I'm the semi-official family history officer Oldest child of the oldest child, you know how it is. Anyway, the short of it is that Mother's family came from Counties Tyrone and Galway, Ireland, about four generations ago, with a bit of German mixed in on mum's mum's side; and Da's family came from Britain in two installments, the Scottish bunch in the early 1800's and the English bunch in about 1635. Interesting people in my family's (enormous -- currently 8,600 member) tree include telegraph genius Samuel Morse, Virginia governor Thomas Page, the Lords Blayney of northern Ireland, and american top 10 tattoo artist Snake Reiman. (*ba-doom-boom ching*)

Family traditions of note: my grandfather being a dead ringer for Santa Claus is good for plenty, but we lost a lot of our culturally-distinctive traditions in the first half of the century. I've never bothered much to look into it, being the religious black sheep of the family (converting to Judaism when everyone else is Christian), but I could check that. I've got a distant cousin in Virginia who knows everything there is to know about the English branch. If you'd like to check out his website, click here -- oo, that's a nice picture of the old homestead (it burned in 1907 but the ruins are being preserved).

[Calavera Diablos]

Ceridwen- *falls over* Boring?! That was incredibly fascinating... Haven't you ever wanted to dig deeper and find out more?

Well, I was born in a small farming village outside of Seoul in South Korea. I didn't know this until recently because my parents forgot and just told me I was from Seoul (the adoption agency was stationed there). I'm from Wondang-Eup, Kyunggi (a province?). I don't know anything about my birth family, other than the fact that my biological father is dead and I have two older brothers. Since I was adopted at a young age, I did not know how to speak Korean and I was exposed to it's culture later in childhood when I was old enough to understand.
My father and his side of the family are Norweigan-French and my mother and her side are Irish-German. We don't have any traditions because both my parents were raised Catholic and disliked it. My mother is a Buddhist- Taoist. Er... *thinks* We do eat Pfeiferneuse (spelling?!), the little German cookies during Christmas. I usually also through in a dash of Winter Solstice things, but not too mch because my dad thinks I'm a New-Age yuppie.

[Ceridwen]

Willow, that's fascinating. It must be a strange mixture of sad and exciting, having such unorthodox origins. I'm amazed!

En, as for the Patron - I'm not actually sure if it's Patron, or Pattern. When I was young, I used to say Pattern, because in the accent of the region of Ireland where I'm from, the word 'pattern' sounds like 'patron', not pronounced the way you'd expect, i.e. a patron of the arts, but shorter, pat-run. I think it's spelled Patron, though. And as for where it came from - I don't know, but I will ask at home. It's probably ancient - I hope!

[Calantha]

Ohhh...family stuff...exciting!

I am a family historian in the making, trained and raised to be one by my grandmother on my father's side. We've been in America for a while...my father's side more than my mother's (my mother's side came from Scotland about 1904-ish). My father's side has been here for a while...or...the most of it, there are a few branches (grandmothers side) who came from Ireland in the early 1920's. My great-great and so forth grandfather worked as an indentured servant for a good while and when the Revolutionary war started up he fought along side his family-blah blah blah-and they couldn't pay him so they gave him land which he put a mill up on which was later washed away in a large flood that killed half of our family back then. My great-great-something uncle on my Nan's side was the president who died after thirty days in office (Harrison? Look how well I know my Presidents) and my great uncle served as multiple president's secret service person-thing and was there when Kennedy was assasinated. There's lore we've got a witch or two in our family and stories about how people healed people by chanting and such and things about demons haunted people and trying to kill them (can you tell one of my family's favourite past-times are telling stories?). There are rumor's we've got ties to the Irish Mofia (who knows? It's "hush hush" you know?) and my great great great grandmother on my father's side was a blackfoot indian who feel in love and fleed to the area in Virginia that my father's side lived in during the time.
Okay, that was longer than I thought.

As far as traditions go? Well, we always go to church on Christmas Eve, Easter, the sunday before St. Patty's day, Thanksgiving weekend, and the church's birthday weekend as a big family. Big meaning the whole 10 of us, although it used to be quite big. It's cool because everyone knows us because, I guess by some odd chance, that when you live in small towns and your family is practically related to everyone by some form or another, you just end up knowing everyone (although they all seem to know me and I don't know them...). It's also a must that we get into one heated discussion per holiday over the dinner table that usually results in someone getting up and screaming over someone else at the dinner table and swearing like no other and then everyone laughing because the other person turns red from anger and a nice pat on the back. We also used to go horseback riding after a meal, but that fizzled out after my uncle (who owned the horses) passes away and my aunt decided to sell the farm. We also butcher every year. I don't do it anymore because it makes me ill so I play poker with my older cousin and I teach my little cousin to play because his mother never lets him do anything. I like to corrupt him when I can .

Wow...I didn't know this was going to turn out so...long...and the sad thing is...I could still go on talking.
*zips mouth*

[potterknowitall]

Hah, I remember doing family trees back in Grade 8 and 9 for Canadian History class I love knowing that infomation, but finding it, with my family, is horrible. Both of my Grandfathers died years before I was born, my one Grandmother is, well, senile, and the other doesn't like to talk about my Grandfather or anything before 1950 Luckily, she keeps a box of all of my Grandfather's war-things which she showed us for the first time a year ago because we needed to verify that he served on juno beach for this memorial. It's got his pay book, medals, some personal items and other things that he brought home which were really neat to see.

Despite my families reluctance to share anything remotely personal, I've mananaged, however, to be able to trace up my family to about my Greatx3's, but not back down. Like, I know my mother's mother's siblings ((or the number of them)), but not their children. Mainly because (a) my Grandmother's forgotten them all and (b) when you start going up to my Grand's, families of 12, 17, 18 aren't unusual.

With my heritage, I'm a mutt. I'm French-German-Irish-Polish. My Irish side came from Cork during, or slightly after, the potato famine era. My German Great-Great something-or-other was a Count who sold his title so he could affort to come over to Canada. My French side used to live in Quebec, and it's most likely that they came over late 1700's, early 1800's ((assuming, considering the number of relatives I can trace up)) The Polish side is anyone's guess.

With coming from 4 different countries so long ago, ((for the most recent immigration, I'm 4th Generation Canadian)) it's really hard to say that we've got any cultural traditions at all. Add to that the fact that we just don't get along, and you get about 2 get-togethers a year with my father's side ((Christmas and token visit)), and a once a year with 3 of my mother's siblings and mother. However, my mother is close with one of her older sisters and we do Easter, Thanksgiving, Chrissy and Birthdays together with our own quirky little traditions in them all. I've also got my adoptive family - my best friend's massive family who I've known since I was *this high* ((or so they love to tell me)). I go to their family reunions and have dinner when her grandmother/great-aunts/relatives are over. I feel bad that I consider them more family than my dad's side and the majority of my mother's, but just because someone's blood doesn't mean it feels like it *shrugs*

[Will]

Argh. My computer has been acting up lately. I hate it. Anyway…

Oh wow, I didn’t expect so many replies this fast. Thanks everyone for your input. This is all just wonderful to hear from all of you. Educational, if you will.

Ceridwen, your family’s story was far from boring. Like you said, some of it was rather sad, but moving.

Ack! No, no, no! Go on and talk, Calantha! I’m fascinated beyond belief. You know so much, as do you, En… and I wish I do too. I have to ask question after question to get just a few good answers and it’s frustrating. Eh. Looking up info is way out of the question.

Pkia, that's amazing. Reading all this makes my family/family tree look so very, very tiny.

Let’s see. I know a few things about one of my grandfathers ((Dad’s side)). He was born in the year of 1914, October something or other. I don’t quite remember. My uncles say that he was a spy for the Taiwanese government, which I believed for some time now… But really, he was a translator since he was good with English. During the time of war, I’m assuming WWII, was when he met my grandmother. I’ll have to ask what exactly it was my grandma was doing at that time… So yeah, that’s one story I know.

Hmmm… I have quite a few other Asian friends and I caught myself saying to one of them something like “That is such an Asian thing”. That got me thinking; since TD is so diverse, like En had mentioned before, how were you raised as a child? As in… what kind of customs do you have? How do the influences from you parents and other relatives affect the way you act/behave today?

Heehee… I find this amusing and scary at the same time. It just came to me and I thought I’d share it. Whenever we have a big family dinner with cousins so on and so forth at a restaurant, the adults always fight for who gets to pay the bill. Seriously, it gets… vicious.

[En]

Hm. If my da's family has things they're weird about -- it's money and horses. My grandmother's grandfather raised race horses and, by most accounts, was a very cruel man. Yet all six of his children graduated from college -- and that was in the late 1800's and early 1900's, when college was still a rare privilege.

The money thing, I think they're weird about because my grandfather's side are your stereotypical thrifty Scots, especially since they were also farmers during the USA's Great Depression. It's taboo to talk about who's paying when we eat out, but they are sort of fighting silently, because it's a status symbol to be the one who gets to pay. Anyway, ever since I was a little kid, I was taught to avert my eyes when money actually changes hands, unless it's my money.

On my mum's mum's side, they're all artists, mostly visual artists. My Nana used to paint a lot, and of course Uncle Snake is well-regarded as a tattoo artist. My mum inherited their artistic eye, and her main medium seems to be quilting, though she's good at quite a lot of things. And Lumie's getting really, really good at drawing. Our brother Joe used to do a lot of cartooning, but with him, it mostly shows in his cooking and in his ability to see proportions really well. He can freehand very straight lines and see without measuring exactly where the halfway point is on things.
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Interesting... Cal and pkia both call their grandfathers "Grand" -- we use "Grandpa" on my da's side and "Papa" on mum's. Willow, Ceri and company, what do your relatives call each other?
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It's a weird thing... my great-grandfather refused to talk about WWI until just before his death, and my grandpa still won't discuss WWII, but the people in my family who fought in later wars will tell you anything you want to know. Is that what everyone else is noticing too? Why is that, do you suppose? (I have theories, but I'm curious what you think.)

Anyone have relatives you know were in wars before WWI?

[Calantha]

My great-uncles who fought in WWII will not talk about it although they will tell me that being in the war was one of the reasons they decided that we should avoid war in all cost. My cousin joined the army and my uncle had a fit because he said he knew too many boys who died and my cousin wasn't going to be one of them (especially fighting for a "dimwitted president like Bush").

People in my family fought during the revolutionary war, civil war, and WWI. At least that's all I know of. We were one of the families fighting brother against brother quite literally. By great so many grandfather fought on the south and his brother who owned land in Maryland fought on the northern side. We have bits and pieces of both their uniforms in a museum in southern Virginia.

I have a great grandfather who was called for duty in WWI on Jun 18th. He was put on the train and when he got there they sent him back home because he no longer needed to serve. He then went back to school and during the Great Depression he opened his farm up to the community. Oddly enough, he died almost to the minute I was born.

My family on my Nan's side are very..hoity-toity...? If that's the word I want to use. They were wealthy and highly educated and a bit on the stuck up side. On my Grand's side they were all deeply attached to the land. On my mother's side, my Popa's side can either be linked to making their money illegally through moonshine or going into the armed forces and on my Grandma's side they're all pretty much city people working in factories trying to make the best living they can.

[En]

*grimly* My cousin just got sent to Bush's War. My grandmother's a mess. She opposes the war, but my grandfather and father support it, so she's having trouble finding anyone to talk to -- this on top of the fact that her daughter is dying of MS. *sigh* I don't come from a long line of sensitive guys.

Mind you, one of the reasons my grandfather and da are pro-war is because they perceive war as a male rite of passage; I've had an ancestor or close relation in every USA war, except for the Korean War in the 50's. My da was opposed to the war in Viet Nam for political reasons, but he did join the Reserve Officer Training Corps of the Air Force and would have gone over if they'd called his draft number.

Since both of them think I'm a freak of nature (the whole transgendered thing), I am excused from military duty I'm also excused from joining the Masons, another wonderful family tradition. Meh.

But yeah, the older guys don't talk about war. In fact, we can't seem to figure out whether Grandfather Page fought for the North or South... no one ever heard him say. His brother fought for the South, but Grandfather Page's relatives in the South disowned him for some reason, and it might have been for fighting on the wrong side during the war.

Hah, Cal, my grandmother's side is the wealthy side too; and my grandfather's side were poor farmers. One great-grandmother always passionately hated the other because she thought her daughter was too good for the other one's son.

[Calantha]

Oh yessss...my great grandmother on my Nan's side loathed my mom because she didn't come from a wealthy family or the wealthy district for that matter. And the mere thought of my mother being an army brat sent her over the edge. Although, she liked my Grand because he graduated top of his class and was given a well respected and high authority working on in the chemistry section of a plant. Although I wish he didn't work there, meh, I can't change the past.

Heh, we've got several family fueds in our history...all of which end with huge chunks of our family not talking to one another and leaving people out of their will and disowning them. It must be the temper thing .

The brother who fought for the north was disowned along with his wife but his children were welcomed warmly at his parents because for some reason grandchildren (children in general) are admired, loved, and spoiled a great deal in my family. Call it tradition if you will...

Does anyone look strikingly like a relative/ancestor?
Everyone says I am the spitting image of my great-great-aunt Fanny. She died alone in a great big house now abandoned and currently owned by my drunken uncle . Although there's this big thing that they think she was seeing "a black man" who "wanted her money" and "seduced her with his devilshly good looks but corrupt soul". That's my family for ya . Always a flare for the dramatic when it comes to other family members.