Emma and Katies Poems!!! Please read YAY

[Emma]

Is it really just a simple crush?

A crush, a crush….more an obsession,
What is the problem, I made my confession,
What is it with you and wrong impressions?
I thought you liked me, you taught me a lesson......

A lesson, a lesson that my life now on is leaning,
To ignore the happiness you give me, and stop of you my dreaming,
You feel deep about another, to think of this my face is greening,
The word heartbroken to this is my meaning......

The meaning, the meaning, the meaning of love,
To love is when you find the person sent for you from above,
This is message to the sister’s and bruv’s,
It’s never too late to find your true love......

True, a true love is the one, who loves you back,
It isn’t a skill; you won’t get the knack,
The fake aren’t the one’s for you to attack,
Just wait, you will find the one true love, who loves you back......


I wrote this, after reading something in a mag about this love story, It Isn't very good,

Please reply, any comment's welcome!!

[Potter723]

thats good, nice ideas...

i like the way you use the last word of one line, on the start of the next...stanza(paragraph thing)

bit hard to read with it centered though.

[Emma]

Better?
Okay, great, thanks

[claretta "happy and not"]

Nice poem!! good work!

[Emma]

Thanks claretta..
But it's not that good....

[claretta "happy and not"]

But when i look at my poems, i see the big difference! And they are alot better than mine!

[hermoine]

Emma I've told you this before and I'm saying it again. It's a wonderful poem, believe me.

And I agree with Vinnie when he said about the starts of the stanze the first word is repeated, it emphasizes it, besides, it's very enjoyable.

[Emma]

Okay okay,

Stanza, wow I learn new word's all the time!!

[ruby]

This is good! I'm doing a poetry lesson in my English class right now. It's such a pain! I can't write poems for anything! Consider yourself lucky that your poems atleast ryme! But anyway, it was really good. when ever i read love poems it makes me all warm and happy on the inside.....ok..said too much,

[Emma]

Well everyone can do it, it might be harder for some, but don't give up......

That's the power of poetry for you!!!

[Emma]

Another one, that I wish to share, and isn't to personal, and I am trying to add a few more verses, its out of 8 so far, 2 for a second, 6 for an ending......but they aren't very good so...

Dancing in the stars
The stars are out tonight
Neither fears nor fright,
can you prove that fears are dead,
your body is as stiff as lead,
let go,
let your body sway, to and fro,
you start to sway,
hey,
come and join me, it's alright,
you can dance with me tonight...

[RainFrost]

I like how the first poem has a certain rythm. It's nice...

And the second poem sets such a pretty picture in my head. I can just imagine the poem in my head being acted out. That's great.

[Emma]

thanks, I kinda imagined what could happen when i was writing it.....

[Potter723]

just read them both through. again.
i really dont know what to say....so much emotion, so well written, with such power...

emma, you should print out the first one...E7 has a poetry board...just ask miss brooks, or i could give it in for you...just a thought.

everybody read through both poems again, slowly....im almost speechless.

emma, youve given me alot to think about...

[Sarah]

wow. emma dear. tons of emotion. i like! i wrote poetry, too, ya know. some have been published, others not so successful. but i like your style of writing.

the first one speaks to me. it makes me feel.....loved. yes, loved. *laughs*

the second one. well you know i love that one. i get an image, too. and ive always felt connected to the stars in a way, even thought they're just big balls of gas.

but yea girly, you've got talent.